Dis-Ease

It’s happening again. Like all chronic conditions the symptoms are easily recognizable. Sometimes they slam right into me like a freight train and all I can do is respond in kind, quick and fierce. Attack back. Other times, like now, they creep in, allowing me time to ponder, cope, maybe reverse course or at least lessen the intensity.

It started with an itch on the bottom of my left foot. Then my right. I began to sigh a lot, becoming restless. I couldn’t concentrate. I became indecisive, apathetic. It was back, after a six month hiatus. Wanderlust. I have to go. I need to leave the country. Where should I go? There was no immediate need to be somewhere else, I just needed to plan. Not a junkie in need of a fix, more like a social butterfly looking for a party.

In my feverish state I pound the keys of my laptop searching for my next adventure. It must be somewhere I’ve never been – which leaves quite a lot open. I have to feel drawn to it, really feel it my gut, put the fire out. Ireland? Maybe. Prague? Oh yes, maybe not this time. Amsterdam? Someday. Iceland? For sure. Eventually. Australia, Bali, Japan, Thailand?

My heart settles on Ireland. My mother is half Irish and having been the child of a very early divorce, knows nothing of her Irish father or his history. I’m intrigued. I have found a tour that circles the entire island, including walking tours – my favorite, a few pubs – a must, and the cliffs, moors and castles one would expect. Yes, Ireland. Green, lush, homeland.

The symptoms have abated, a decision has been made. But this decision has not yet lead to the purchase of airfare and accommodations. So there’s still a little tickle as we wait for the money to manifest, and it will, it always does. The Universe likes me to travel, we have an agreement.

Until I’m on the big green island I will satisfy my chronic ailment by taking little day trips to the beach, the national forest, maybe make my way back out to the west coast, possibly NYC in December in all its splendor. I won’t be sitting still, in any event,I will be wandering forward, camera in hand, toward Ireland.